Why You Give Everything and Get Nothing Back

What This Session Explores

 

• How unmet childhood needs can drive self-abandonment
• Recognizing patterns of codependency in all relationships
• The link between overgiving, resentment, and emotional exhaustion
• Practical exercises to identify and pause draining behaviors
• Developing self-worth and internal boundaries

Self-abandonment often starts early in life when our emotional needs—attention, validation, or affection—weren’t fully met by caregivers. Without conscious awareness, we may try to get those needs met by others, giving more than we receive. This pattern isn’t a personal flaw; it’s a survival strategy that helped us cope, often for years or even decades.

Over time, the behaviors become automatic. You might overextend yourself for a partner, friend, child, or coworker without expecting thanks, yet feel a deep internal pressure to keep doing more. When the effort isn’t reciprocated, resentment and exhaustion build. Amanda highlights that these patterns show up across relationships, not just romantic ones, and are often tied to early emotional abandonment rather than one specific event.

She guides viewers through a practical exercise to clarify these patterns: writing down the behaviors that drain you and exploring what fears or beliefs keep you stuck. This process can help identify areas where boundaries are needed and where additional support—through friends, support groups, or therapy—might be helpful. Importantly, stepping into this work involves fear, but bravery is acting despite it. On the other side of this fear is the chance to discover a deeper sense of self that isn’t tied to what you give others but to your inherent worth.

Amanda Morrow is a clinical supervisor at Milestones Onsite, with extensive experience helping clients navigate self-abandonment and relational patterns.